On Wednesday of this week I celebrate 31 years on this spinning blue rock. Which, for those who know me (and a certain prediction I made when I was in my 20's about my 30th) , is miraculous in and of itself.
When I turned 30 friends were concerned that I would follow through with my prediction. I had a bad year, I was hopelessly single, following a bad break-up, job is stagnant and just plan felt sick of it all. However on our way to the Hoffbrau Haus I told my friends that when I woke up that morning I had decided that things would be different this coming year and tonight was "Baptism by Beer". I was going to let go and just have fun and not worry (one of the hardest things for me to do). Sparing you all the details the night was fun and I enjoyed myself.
Now, a year later I find myself taking stock. I have lightened up allot. I am enjoying life a little more and now I met a lovely girl who thinks the world of me (God Bless her!!) and I feel the same.
I find myself having to reevaluate my path, my life.....<Sigh> AGAIN!! And I fear slipping back to my old ways of worrying. I fear about the future...making a wrong choice. With the economy the way it is what is the safe bet. I know I must have faith that God has a plan but wouldn't mind a little nudge or 2. I feel that I am at a crossroads and that I must make a decision SOON about which way to go. Both choices are unclear both full of potential Happiness AND Sorrow; making the choosing very difficult. I feel like I am lost in a forest on a starless, moonless night with no compass and just the clothes on my back. Howver lost I am I feel that I am in a good place just frustrating all the uncertainty.
So, to in a positive note I've drawn the following conclusion:
One year later I am better than I was 2 years ago, albeit confused BUT Happy....Very Happy. I only hope that these continuing voyages around the sun only get better.
The Wild (OLDer) Knight
We tend to think we're lost when we don't know what to do, or what path we should take... doesn't mean we are though. There tends to be a greater scheme to these kinds of things... all we can do is take the directions we're given, whether we recognize them as such or not, and find out what's in store at the end of the trip. Personally I think this is something God does to people when he's bored xD Interesting where you wing up in the end though...
ReplyDeletePseudo-philosophical babble aside, glad the year has been a good one. Here's hoping they just keep getting better from here. :D